David Letterman: "The health-care reform bill has passed by the House. Well, that was easy. And you know what that means, it's just one step away to being defeated by the Senate."
Jay Leno: "Now it gets tricky because the bill goes to the Senate, where Senator Lindsey Graham vowed it would be dead on arrival. That's what he said. In fact, right now, Graham is leading a Southern white coalition against the bill called the Graham Crackers."
Jay Leno: "It was reported today 237 members of Congress are millionaires. Almost half of Congress are millionaires. Isn't that unbelievable? So, apparently, Congress is pretty good at managing their own money, it's just our money they suck at managing."
Source: U.S. News and World Report